Expectations of My Spouse

Before Bonnie and I got married (4/4/2009), we went to a few pre-marital counseling sessions at the direction of our church. One of our assignments was to individually write a list of “What We Expected of Our Spouse” and then share it during one of counseling sessions… Fortunately, everything matched up. :) Even so, we kept our lists of expectations and review it from time to time to keep us on track. For quick reference, I’m posting them here:

Bonnie’s Expecations of a Husband

  1. A man who seeks a personal relationship with God
  2. Loves and receives love freely
  3. Not afraid to cross gender roles … ie. clen the toilet, wash dishes, cook a meal, watch a girly movie
  4. Takes care of bugs, snakes, and rodents inside the house
  5. Keeps sacred his quiet time with God
  6. Affectionate, hugs, kisses, back massages, foot massages
  7. Regular physical intimacy
  8. Is by my side at a party, work or social gathering, especially at the beginning
  9. Mental and emotional awareness – talks about feelings
  10. Communication – Tells me when something is not as it could be, tells me when he’s upset
  11. Likes and makes time to travel
  12. Is capable of grocery shopping
  13. Holds my hand in public and private
  14. Makes time to sit and talk or walk and talk
  15. Has my best interest at hand and knows that I have his best interest at hand
  16. Makes important decisions with me
  17. Is a leader in most aspects of his life
  18. Tells me he loves me everyday
  19. Fixes broken items around the house and mows the lawn
  20. Challnges himself and me to be a better person

Omar’s Expectations of a Wife

  1. She must love Jesus above all things
  2. She must be passionate about her work
  3. She must think I’m hilarious
  4. She must love my family
  5. She must be adventurous in life
  6. She must be a risk taker
  7. She must be willing to confront issues head on
  8. She must be confident in herself
  9. She must be vulnerable with me
  10. She must be ok with my time on the computer
  11. She must not be materialistic
  12. She must not lose focus on God’s greater plan
  13. She must like back yard bbqs and cold beer
  14. She must give all people the benefit of the doubt
  15. She must want children (one day)
  16. She must love to travel
  17. She must completely disagree with pop culture
  18. She must be financially responsible
  19. She must live a healthy lifestyle (exercise / no drugs)
  20. She must always believe that the best is yet to come