Day 132 – Faith

Dealing with unknown shouldn’t really be that difficult, seeing as how we have no idea what tomorrow will bring.  Even so, in the American Society we live in, we convince (fool) ourselves into thinking that we have complete control over everything.  That is, until we surrender our lives to the will of God and accept the fact that when compared to God, we aren’t so powerful and in control after all.

Last night, I had a really hard time sleeping…  I could stop thinking (worrying) about the future and all the things that are outside of my control.  In particular, our current situation of fundraising and housing (or lack there of).  With regards to the fundraising, it’s so hard for me to be at the mercy of other people and their sacrifices…  “What if people won’t support?”

Now, I’ve said it a million times:  God Always Provides.  I have no doubt about that.  It’s the “how is He going to do it?” that’s driving me nuts.  Then, the question of housing arises…  We’d like to stay in Florida for the next couple of months, primarily so Bonnie can work on her pottery (I can work anywhere).  Yet, finding a three month lease on a budget is no easy task.  Again, I know God will provide, but “how?”

Matthew 6:25-30 tells us specifically not to worry:

25“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life[a]? 28“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?

With this in mind, it makes me feel like crap when I stress out, “O me of little faith.”

Thus, I’ve decided to fast today, and everytime I feel hungry I will remember that all of my issues are in the hands of a very capable God.

Nobody said this was going to be easy.  :)

Update:  3 minutes after posting this, a woman and her baby came up to the house looking for Spencer’s family.  She was in desperate need of help and someone told her that Spencer’s family helped people…  She was out of work, her power had been turned off, her older child was living with her mother since she couldn’t take care of her, and her baby hadn’t had anything to eat in the past 24 hours except for a box of juice.  As her residency from Nicaragua has expired, she is unable to find work.  She didn’t know where else to go, so she showed up on our doorstep.

Thus, we put together a bag of food (rice, beans, cereal, eggs, etc), told her where our mission team house was, and invited her to church on Sunday.  She was very humble and grateful…

Just when you think you have real problems, God shows you what real problems are all about.  We’re so blessed we’re giving up food (fasting) and here people are starving on our doorstep.

I have no problems.